Growing up

Jr. High.
Center stage today, on top of the world.
Laughing stock tomorrow plagued and scorned.
Body changing. Burdens to bear.
Wild Moods, stealing, lying, fighting like betas to the death!
Not a good time to loose your Daddy.
New friends in the library at lunch time.

High school.
Discovering strengths and weaknesses.
To admire and be admired. To need and be needed.
Bonding. Depth… and hilarity, found in unusual places.
Appreciating differences. Sharing similar bents.
You dance to express yourself. I run to clear my head.
Long walks, long talks….melancholy if not ridiculous.
Gallons of cookies and cream and honest rebukes.
Still soul searching through the chaos of abandonment.
One parent struggles to play the part of two.
Distractions, insecurities, learning the hard way.
Broken hearts and goodbyes for the best.
“Maybe next time.”

Growing up.
College. Finding work, figuring things out.
Failing and succeeding- miserably.
Blooming radiance. Accomplishing the impossible.
Not completely empty, yet not completely full.
A new community of like-mindedness,
expressive, artistic, athletic, intelligent and spiritual….
challenging you, putting you in your place with gut wrenching honesty.

And here’s to waking up to the one
you were not looking for, but was suddenly there.
Holding your hand, listening, talking, but mostly listening.
My best friend, my helpmate.
The Father of my children. One lover for the rest of my life.
Heavy burdens to bear, life decisions to make, restless nights.
So many counting on you to be your best when you feel your worst.
Body changing again….but not exactly like before.
Same mind, though limited, tired and aged.
Something is forever, and we are beautiful to those who really see us.

In His grace and mercy he plucked me out.
He planted me in soil, rich with blooming flowers
of quiet confidence and intelligent design.
Unequal, undeserving, yet accepted, nurtured and loved.
Protected, preserved and strengthened by God
through fathers and mothers, sisters and brothers,
friends and neighbors, husbands, wives, and children.

Abba Father like no other.
His death is my life, His life is my strength.
Now I dance to express myself...
and run the race that is set before me
with perseverance and faith.

To you who are here between these lines,
I write in gratitude for your part in my Song.
Never ceasing to make mention of you in my prayers,


“Eddie” aka “Toma” aka “Dove”